Teaching coping skills!

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No matter how mentally healthy, resilient, or happy you are, there comes a time in every person’s life when he or she will need to cope with something difficult. Coping is something we all do, whether we do it consciously or without thinking.
It’s watching a funny movie when we’re sad, calling a friend to help you get through a breakup, or going out for a drink after a work day that didn’t go well. Some ways we cope are healthy and build resilience, while others simply help us avoid the real problems or encourage destructive behavior.
The kids as well need to learn how to cope in a healthy and non-destructive way, here I'm going to present some examples and some adult worksheets.
 
There are nearly infinite ways to cope. We all use different methods that suit our unique personalities and needs. You may find that what causes stress in one individual will help another to cope.
It’s not important whether you cope like everyone else; all that matters is that you find effective coping methods that will help you build resilience and thrive!
That being said, don’t beat yourself up if you just need a little distraction sometimes. Below, you’ll find Blake Flannery’s (2016) master list of coping methods and skills organized into categories. Whatever you need in the moment, there is probably at least one activity mentioned below that will help!
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Diversions:
  • Write, draw, paint, photography
  • Play an instrument, sing, dance, act
  • Take a shower or a bath
  • Garden
  • Take a walk, or go for a drive
  • Watch television or a movie
  • Watch cute kitten videos on YouTube
  • Play a game
  • Go shopping
  • Clean or organize your environment
  • Read
  • Take a break or vacation

Social/Interpersonal Coping:
  • Talk to someone you trust
  • Set boundaries and say “no”
  • Write a note to someone you care about
  • Be assertive
  • Use humor
  • Spend time with friends and/or family
  • Serve someone in need
  • Care for or play with a pet
  • Role-play challenging situations with others
  • Encourage others

Cognitive Coping:
  • Make a gratitude list
  • Brainstorm solutions
  • Lower your expectations of the situation
  • Keep an inspirational quote with you
  • Be flexible
  • Write a list of goals
  • Take a class Act opposite of negative feelings
  • Write a list of pros and cons for decisions
  • Reward or pamper yourself when successful
  • Write a list of strengths
  • Accept a challenge with a positive attitude

Tension Releasers:
  • Exercise or play sports
  • Catharsis (yelling in the bathroom, punching a punching bag)
  • Cry
  • Laugh

Physical:
  • Get enough sleep
  • Eat healthy foods
  • Get into a good routine
  • Eat a little chocolate
  • Limit caffeine
  • Deep/slow breathing

Spiritual:
  • Pray or meditate
  • Enjoy nature
  • Get involved in a worthy cause

Limit Setting:
  • Drop some involvement
  • Prioritize important tasks
  • Use assertive communication
  • Schedule time for yourself

The Mental Health Wellness Week (MHWW) website also lists some coping skills, some that are positive and encourage mental health, and others that are destructive or used to avoid your problems.
The good coping skills include:
  • Meditation and relaxation techniques
  • Having time to yourself
  • Physical activity or exercise
  • Reading
  • Spending time with friends
  • Finding humor
  • Spending time on your hobbies
  • Spirituality
  • Quality time with your pets
  • Getting a good night’s sleep
  • Eating healthy

Negative coping skills include:
  • Drugs
  • Excessive alcohol
  • Self-mutilation
  • Ignoring or bottling up feelings
  • Taking sedatives
  • Taking stimulants
  • Working too much
  • Avoiding your problems
  • Denial

Aside from using the positive coping methods, the MHWW website also suggests ten tips you can put to use to strengthen your mental state and build resilience to life’s stressors:
  • Build up your confidence
  • Accept compliments when they are given to you
  • Be sure to make time for your loved ones
  • Give support to others when needed and accept support from others when needed
  • Create and stick to a realistic budget
  • Volunteer in your community
  • Find ways to manage your stress on a regular basis
  • Share your burdens with others, especially those who have been through the same things
  • Identify and address your shifting moods
  • Learn how to be at peace with yourself

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While none of these tips are easy to follow, they are sure to provide you with the strength and resilience you need to navigate difficult times in your life (MHWW.org).
If you’re still looking for more coping methods, see this list of 99 – yes, 99 – ways to cope. This resource also has suggestions for positive coping, as well as a quick three minute video on feeling stressed or anxious.

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